


L'Oeillet Rouge

by Laraxmeh



Category: Twenty One Pilots
Genre: Alternate Universe - Coffee Shops & Cafés, Dating, Fluff and Humor, Gay, M/M, Musicians, No Angst, Romantic Fluff, Sleepovers, Soft Boys
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-03
Updated: 2019-05-18
Packaged: 2019-10-21 11:55:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 10
Words: 16,140
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17642300
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Laraxmeh/pseuds/Laraxmeh
Summary: One of Tyler Joseph's favourite places in his hometown is the cozy café "L'Oeillet Rouge". One day on his way home, he stops at a local vinyl shop where this cute stranger called Josh, asks him to recommend him anything he wants in this shop. Tyler starts to think that meeting Josh is more than a little coincidence.This is an angst-free zone.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you enjoy reading the first part of this story. I'm excited to continue writing and I would be glad if you left a comment about how you think about it. Language corrections are very appreciated because English is not my first language.

L’Oeillet Rouge. A small, yet cozy coffeehouse, placed in the German Village of Columbus, Ohio. Since Tyler’s senior year, he’s been coming here to study, to drink coffee that is too good for its actual price and also to feel at least a bit social. After his graduation, the few friends he’s had went to college or university and are therefore busy most of the time now. Which results in Tyler having a lot of time for himself. After hours of conversation with his parents about a scholarship for college because of basketball, he declined it, much to his family’s dislike.

So for now, he is fine with occupying the same spot in the left hand corner facing the window front of the coffeehouse that shows the rather busy street right in front of it. Tyler likes watching people. Not in a creepy way, but more in a genuinely curious way. Sometimes little stories appear in his head, he would ask himself why this guy decided that it was a good idea to wear this weird looking pants or whether these girls are ditching class or just looking young enough to be still in school. It is not uncommon for him to watch couples or two seemingly good friends with a silent, almost unconscious desire, thinking that there is nothing more he craves in his young life. In times when he feels more lonely than usual, he even creates imaginations about him and a non-existent friend, how they sit in this place and chat about little nothings.

School and basketball made it easy for Tyler to have contact to peers, but since he graduated, it’s becoming harder and harder for him to build something like a friendship. And he knows how unhealthy isolation can get, so in order to avoid that, he decided that L’Oeillet Rouge is as social as he can get. It won’t work forever, but it does for now.

Today is a special day for Tyler. He’s come to one of his favorite places in Columbus, having a notebook and a pen with him. For a couple days, he’s been having some thoughts in his head that could be the start of a poem. While he was still playing basketball in high school, he found out that he likes poetry and every now and then he has ideas. Those ideas are raw, unspoken, they just exist in Tyler’s head and notebook. He doesn’t know, whether he’s too ashamed or too insecure to show them to his family. Because talking with his very conservative, religious parents about doubts of God and Christianity, is not something he’s keen on doing. He also might not have mentioned that he likes boys because of that. Avoiding conflicts is a special quality of him. Sometimes he thinks he’s too good at that.

“Can't stop thinking about if and when I'd die  
For now I see that "if" and "when" are truly different cries  
For "if" is purely panic and "when" is solemn sorrow  
And one invades today while the other spies tomorrow”

That’s all he has after almost two hours. His mind is exhausted, but Tyler feels good about the few lines he just created. Creating something that hasn’t been there before is what deeply fascinates him. One of his goals in life is to inspire others to feel the same way.

After he says goodbye to the baristas who have known him for a while because he’s a regular, Tyler is on his way home. Not far away from L’oeillet Rouge is this small local vinyl shop and for some fateful reason, he decides to enter the shop to have a look at the recommendations and new releases. Besides poetry, music is another passion of him, there has been times in his life when music was all he had. While walking through the aisles ofalternative rock, he sees a guy, probably around his age, checking out a cover ofDeath Cab for Cutie’s Transatlanticism. Tyler thought he must have a good taste in music because this album is one of his favorites.

He turns his back from the guy and starts looking at a vinyl of The Killer’s „Day & Age“. He’s thinking of buying it when he suddenly hears a calm, yet slightly nervous voice right behind him saying “ Sorry, if I bother you, but do you happen to have a recommendation for me? Alternative is fine, but you can give me anything you think is good in this store.” For a second he wonders if this guy - and now that he can have a look on his face, he realizes that he’s actually really cute- is talking to him, so he asks out of reflex “Are talking to me?” “Yeah, that was my intention.“ The stranger lets out a quiet chuckle and rises his hand to scratch the back of his head. „Why are you asking me, when there’s an employee just down the aisle?“ Tyler’s curiosity is purely genuine, he couldn’t understand why his taste in music is good or interesting enough to be known by this man with bright red hair peaking out under his beanie. „See, I kinda have this tradition when it comes to music shops like this. I usually find the most tattooed guy and ask him what he can recommend me in this shop. So what do you think I should get?“ That’s kinda weird, but also interesting, Tyler thinks. Looking around he sees nobody else having at least visible tattoos. Tyler although has his thin and bold lines on his left arm, as well as his symbols and the phrase „carpe noctem“ on his right arm perfectly on display because of his shirt. Only now does he realize that the guy in front of him has his right arm completely full of ink. „“Yeah, you can’t ask yourself to recommend music, I guess.“ Tyler attempts to joke, even though he thinks it’s very cheesy. But the cute stranger just laughs at it and shows his white teeth, that almost look fake. „But if you are really interested in my opinion, get the new Killers album ‚Day & Age‘. I might actually get it myself too.“

Taking one copy of said album out of the crate next to him, Tyler hands it to the guy. „I think I listened to a couple of songs of these guys, but yeah, I’ll definitely give it a try, dude. My name’s Josh by the way.“ „Tyler“, he replies and shakes hands with Josh. „Thanks, man. Have a good one!“ „Yeah ugh, you too.“ Josh smiles, but turns his back towards Tyler and walks to the next cashier, „Day & Age“ now in his possession and leaves the shop. Tyler watches him and is somehow too captivated to move. 

He can’t explain what it is about Josh, but talking to him seemed so easy, like he has been a good friend of him for years. Now, you’re exaggerating, he tells himself, lets out a breath he has been holding while watching the really cute guy leaving. He grabs another vinyl of that albumJosh has just bought, _only because he told him to_ and moves to the check out. 

Tyler has never really questioned little coincidences in his life before. Certain things just happen, no matter how little the actual probability is, but there is something about Josh, that makes Tyler start thinking, that there are moments in his life, that only happen because of _fate._


	2. Chapter 2

Being alone and being lonely are two different things. Alone means separation from others, lonely is the depressing feeling you get when you are alone and the absence of others. Both can affect physical and mental issues, psychologists claim that loneliness is the most common state or feeling of people with mental health problems. „While not all lonely people are suicidal, all suicidal people are lonely {…} Lonely people tend to eat worse, get less exercise, not sleep as well.{…} Those who are socially isolated suffer from higher all-cause mortality, and higher rates of cancer, infection and heart disease.“ Tyler sighs and closes the site on which he was reading this article about loneliness just seconds ago. Enough psychology for today, he doesn’t want to face his reflection through this mental mirror anymore. 

Not far away from the centre of Columbus, there is the Highbanks Metro Park. When Tyler was younger, his parents would take his brothers and sister to the trails inside and around the forest. While his siblings weren’t impressed by the nature, he’s found an inexplicable fascination in this place. His family might not even remember this park because they haven’t visited it in more than seven years, but Tyler does remember and today he decides to drive all the way up to take a walk on one of the trails. While he collects all the stuff in his room he thinks he will need for this little journey, he thinks about asking one of his siblings if they wanted to join him, but since he assumes they wouldn’t be as excited as he is, he decides to write a note to his parents that he’ll be gone for a while, but will be back in the evening. That’s enough for them to know, he tells himself and heads downstairs for his shoes and a jacket. In his car, he has a map and takes a look on Columbus’ streets and highways. It doesn’t take long to find the way to Highbanks, he was old enough the last couple times to save parts of it in his head. But still, it’s more than seven years ago since he last saw the park.

Finding a parking lot is easy in the middle of the week, most of the tourists and visitors tend to be here on the weekend. Tyler is standing in front a big wooden map that shows the whole area including all trails and fields. Not thinking too much of it, he decides to take the „Coyote Run“ trail. 

It’s so quiet except for singing birds, the flowing river close by the forest, winds that blow through the treetops and Tyler’s steady breathe. The sun is peaking through here and there, it’s mildly warm, so whenever he walks in a sunny spot, he immediately feels the warmth on his skin. Tyler closes his eyes and tries to absorb as much nature as he can. In his head are flying words, almost so visual for his inner eye that he thinks, if he just focusses hard enough on them, he will see them dancing in front of him when he opens his eyes again.

„I know  
Where you stand  
Silent  
In the trees  
And that's  
Where I am  
Silent  
In the trees“ 

Blinking away unexpected tears, he continues his walk until he spots a side trail that looks like a couple visitors have made on their own. Tyler can’t see how long it is or where it ends, but without thinking twice he changes his path and starts walking through narrow trees and bushes. Eventually, he arrives at a small clearing in the middle of the forest. There is a pond, barely as big as an average living room, its water reflecting the sunshine in a way that it looks like crystals might be swimming in it. Grass and a couple of other weeds are surrounding the pond, the wind makes them slightlymove.

Tyler watches the trees, the pond, the weeds, everything he can find in this place that seems too magical to be real. Sitting down near the water, he takes off his backpack and jacket, since the sun is constantly spending enough warmth on his spot and uses the latter as a makeshift pillow to lay down in the grass. Closing his eyes again, he deeply inhales and exhales the fresh air. Never would he think that he can find an extraordinary place like this. And never would he think that he can be interrupted in this moment of fascination and relaxation. But he does get interrupted. 

„Huh, thought this was my secret spot, but looks like it’s not secret anymore“ the voice said amused. Not expecting to hear a human voice at all, Tyler quickly sits up and looks for the source of this voice. He blinks four to five times when he sees who has joined him in this hidden clearing. „You’re Josh“ he blurts out and realizes how weird this must sound. „I know that, dude. And I know you. You’re Tyler. The guy who told me to get ‚Day & Age‘. By the way, this record is freaking good, so I think I actually have to thank you for that.“ Josh closes the distance between them until he is only a couple feet away from Tyler. „Ugh, you’re welcome, I guess. What are you doing here, if I may ask you that?“ Still startled and confused about Josh’s sudden appearance, Tyler thinks it might not be a bad idea to have at least normal small talk with him. It’s been only a week since they met in that local vinyl shop and Tyler still can remember how good and easy it felt to talk to Josh. „ Oh, I found this pond a few months ago and come by whenever I feel like it. It was kinda my secret place because no one ever takes this small side trail. My turn now, what are you doing here?“ He has the same smile that he had when he first talked to Tyler and somehow - it must be the good lighting - Josh looks even cuter now in his eyes. Thinking about his question, Tyler hesitates to response. What is it that he’s doing here, why is he here, why here in this specific clearing, why today, why him, why Josh, why, why, why. „I honestly have no idea how to answer that question“ he says as the best response he can produce in this moment of unknown answers. „But I can leave of course if you want to be alone here. I feel like I kinda stole your place, even though it’s a public park.“ Already starting to shoulder his backpack, Tyler decides that he is no longer welcome in this beautiful place, despite what he just said. „I’ve never said, you have to leave. You can stay, I don’t have any right to be mad at you for being in a public park as you’ve already said. Maybe you’ll find an answer to my question eventually.“ Josh returns now with a small smirk around his lips. Tyler thinks, it should be forbidden to look this cute. 

Sitting now in front of him, Josh looks at his surroundings and starts speaking again, since Tyler hasn’t replied anything yet. „I guess, I come here to live. This probably sounds really weird. It’s just, this place, this pond, those trees, they make me feel alive. Not that I completely feel dead whenever I leave this spot, but it’s just this feeling, that keeps me coming by again and again, you know what I mean?“ Josh’s expression looks like he actually isn’t sure whether Tyler would get him or not, there is even a small shade of embarrassment on his face. Like he worries that he was too deep, that he was too open with his thoughts for Tyler. But Tyler doesn’t think that. Tyler knows exactly what Josh has tried to say. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The quotes about loneliness are from this site https://www.medicaldaily.com/can-you-die-loneliness-how-isolation-shortens-lifespan-harms-health-408696 
> 
> I hope you enjoyed this chapter too.


	3. Chapter 3

„Escaping the world outside the park.“ „Huh?“ Josh returns and furrows his brow. „That’s what I’m doing here right now. I mean, since I entered the forest, I’ve been starstruck by this incredible nature. And sure, I enjoy it. But then I found this place that feels like a totally different world. A world I would never leave if I could“ Tyler explains. He almost expects Josh to laugh at him or to think how awkward Tyler must be, but he is proven wrong. „Totally, this clearing feels… I don’t know, naturally magical to me. I can almost sense this special energy radiating through the ground. Wow, this sounds like I’m high or something. I swear dude, I’m not!“ Josh laughs at himself now and it’s so contagious that Tyler joins him. „Don’t worry, I don’t think it sounded too weird.“ He calms down and a thought flashes through his head, so sudden and yet so heavy, that he completely stops smiling. This, being here with Josh, talking to him, laughing with him, this is what he’s been needing, in fact a lot longer than he might want to admit to himself. „What’s wrong?“ Josh asks and his face changes to a worried expression. „Nothing, I guess I just realize that I really like talking to you.“ The smile appears again. „I like talking to you too, Tyler. We should do that again.“ Tyler starts smiling as well, his heart beats a little faster than usual.

„Can I ask you what you do for a living, in this weird world outside this paradisiac place I mean.“ He is curious what he is about to say, for some reason, he wants to know as much as he can about Josh. „Oh, I work at Starbucks on Sycamore Street. It’s just a thing I do because I’ve gotta do something. I’d like to be able to play drums for a living, though.“ Tyler’s eyes lit up. „You play the drums? That’s so cool dude, I play the piano, self-taught, but still. And yeah, I work at Mitchel’s Steakhouse as a servant, but oh man, I know for sure that I would quit it as soon as I could.“ „Ugh, same!“ Josh nods. „So, what would you think about doing this again? I mean us meeting again… and like talking…“ Tyler can see that Josh tries to be casual about it, but he senses his nervousness anyways. Tyler almost laughs about it because he probable is just as nervous as Josh. „I’ll have my day off on Wednesday, what about you?“ Now Josh’s eyes lit up. „Same for me, do you know another place we could meet? This place here is still nice, but next week is supposed to be rainy.“ Thinking about it, Tyler quickly has an idea. „Do you know the small coffeehouse ‚L’Oeillet Rouge‘? It’s in the German Village. I really like it cause it’s usually not too crowded and the coffee is just ethereal. At least for me.“ Josh’s face shows an expression of fascination and excitement. „I’d love to see this place, let’s say 3pm?“ „Absolutely“ Tyler agrees. He can’t believe he is going to meet Josh again. His head is a mess, but for once he is fine with that.

On his way home, Tyler still can’t stop smiling. His chest is feeling tight, not in a suffocating, but more in an anticipating and exciting way. Josh seems like a guy who can be a good friend. While talking to him, Tyler felt save, understood and light. After high school, he learned how exhausting and demanding social interaction can make him feel, even with close people such as his parents. While driving, he thinks about telling them about Josh. And his mind begins to wander. Right now, they wouldn’t suspect anything about Tyler and Josh, they would assume their son has made a new friend and that’s it. But a small voice in his head tells him Josh could be more. More than a friend. And that’s a thought, he can neither say out loud, nor in front of his parents. So he decides to stay silent about Josh for now. Though in his head, he is as loud and joyful as he wants about the cute, not longer stranger with red hair.

‚Today turnt out better than I first thought. I found this clearing in the middle of the forest in Highbanks Metro Park. I felt like I was in another world, but I wasn’t alone for long. The cute stranger from this vinyl shop - Josh - showed up and we even talked. Like, we seriously had a conversation. And it felt so good, I can’t describe it. I don’t know whether I missed talking to someone like this for a while or if I ever had someone I could talk to like this. I’m twisted and confused, why do I feel so different about Josh. Isn’t he just a guy that I met coincidently twice in Columbus? What is it about him that makes me feel so light and bright?’ Tyler exhales a deep breath, closes his journal and puts it on his bedside table.


	4. Chapter 4

On his way to L’Oeillet Rouge, Tyler’s head is a pool of swirling thoughts. He is about to meet Josh again and he can’t remember the last time he was this nervous and buzzing with anticipation. Even though he tried to leave his house not too early, he arrives 10 minutes before 3 pm at the coffeeshop. Looking around, he decides to already save a table for two, but waits for Josh to order. Just out of habit, Tyler takes out his journal and starts doodling to kill time. His mind soon creates a whole body, looking animalistic, but there is something off that he can’t explain. It is cute, he thinks.

Deep in his headspace, Tyler doesn’t notice how Josh enters the shop, nor does he look up when he is standing right in front of him. Carefully, Josh taps on Tyler’s shoulder. “Don’t want to interrupt you, but I think we wanted to meet right here right now, didn’t we?” “Oh my God, I’m so sorry!” Tyler almost jumps out of his chair, he was so deep in his doodling. Now that he has a proper look at Josh, he needs to take an extra breath. How can he manage to look better than the last time he saw him, Tyler wonders quietly. “It’s really good to see you, ugh, this is actually one of my favorite places here in Columbus. Should we order already?” He asks while putting his journal back in his bag. “Sure, but you need to give me some advice on what I should get.” Josh grins and his teeth are showing which makes Tyler stop thinking for a second.

In front of the menu, Tyler points to the list of hot beverages. “Okay, so I’ll take the Latte Macchiato with a shot of salted caramel. Sounds weird, but feels like a firework in your throat.” Josh starts laughing and says “You’re really good at describing this spectacular feeling this macchiato gives you. And you totally make me want to feel it too, so I’m down for that guy.” Tyler feels a flash of pride and a slight blush on his cheeks. After paying, they return to their table while their orders are prepared. ”I totally forgot to ask, how are you?” Tyler asks as they sit down. ”Good I guess. Starbucks is still boring, though.” Josh replies with a grin. ”What about you, Tyler?” ”Better now, I’d say. Got stuck in an argument with my parents about careers and future, so seeing you is probably soothing for my brain.” Tyler tries to make it sound less serious than it actually is, but Josh gets him just right. ”Ugh, this sucks, dude.” He returns in a comforting and understanding tone. ”Yeah, it’s just that I feel like I don’t belong in this traditional career world, this 9 to 5 system, this hierarchy inside a company, nor do I want to be pressured to a burn-out by some douchebag as a manager, you know?” Tyler explains while taking small sips of his mug that arrived while he started talking. ”I don’t really know what I want to do for a living. All I know is that I won’t work in a restaurant forever and basketball isn’t an option either.” ”You played basketball?” Josh looks surprised. ”Feels like my whole life, yes. My parents’ plan for me was getting a scholarship for college. So basketball it was. And when I got a scholarship, I finally decided to decline it. Playing is cool, but for some reason, Iknew that I don’t want to spend any more decades in a sweat-smelling gym.” Josh nods and points on his mug. ”Can I just say that this guy here is really delicious? Now I get what you meant before about having a firework down your throat!” Both boys start laughing. ”I’m glad you like it. I would feel so bad if you didn’t” Tyler admits. ”So tell me then. In what kind of world do you want to live in? When it’s neither the traditional path nor basketball, I mean. Do you have any ideas? By the way, I totally agree with you about this traditional world of work. Definitely not for me.” Taking his time, Tyler thinks of his answer while looking around the café.

Carefully, he says ” A world that lets me be as creative as I want. I’ve been thinking about doing this music thing since I play piano and have some poems that could be transformed into actual song lyrics. But I don’t know if this could work out. It’d be risky and I know no one in this industry which would be pretty useful so I could get my work to people, you know? In addition, I’m not even a big fan of this whole music industry, at least I’ve read some weird and scary stories, like how artists are caught in their contract. I don’t want to support that either, I guess.” Tapping on his mug, he watches Josh’s face for any reaction. Now it’s his time to take some time to reply. ”Creativity is so precious and I think music is one of the best way to express it. That’s what I love about playing the drums. Some might say, you can’t be very creative in a drum beat, but I’m convinced that it actually can be so versatile. Most people just don’t really try. What kind of songs are you thinking of? Do you have a common thread in your mind or is there a connection between your poems and ideas at all?” Tyler is impressed how deeply Josh is interested in his visions and thoughts. It feels so good to talk to him without getting negative response, concerns or corrections. And again, it’s so easy to talk to Josh that Tyler doesn’t want them stop anytime soon. “Usually, it’s dark, like I try to put all my negative feelings in them, mostly hidden in metaphors or twisted lines. I’ve found out I like to use sleep as a common thing, but I it’s not actually sleeping in a soft bed and waking up a few hours later. More like going to sleep and never wake up again.” Too insecure about what he just said, Tyler keeps looking on his hands on the table, holding his mug.

”Does it help you? Writing and creating, I mean? Do feel better after you read it over?” Tyler shrugs. ”You would think so, right? It does for sure, but sometimes I feel like this creating process is a blessing and a curse. It’s cleansing because, yeah, I can turn my insecurities into something better, I can make people understand what I’m struggling with, maybe there’re some people who can relate with my struggles too while they would be listening to my songs. But on the other side, just because I write it down, it doesn’t mean it’s out of my system. I still have those insecurities and struggles, now I just decided to put them into poems. And creating something that is heavily depending on your emotions for me is like diving in a lake without really knowing when you get up again, when you can breathe again. Because that’s what I’m doing, I dive into my mind, trying to understand what I’m feeling and why I’m feeling it in as much detail as I can. This side is kinda poisonous for me, I guess.” Josh looks up. ”Chlorine.” That’s all he says. ”What do you mean?” Tyler wonders. What does a chemical have anything to do with his creativity? ”You know how chlorine is used usually, right? As a cleaning product because it kills bad bacteria. But you don’t want this chemical in your system because it’s highly poisonous for humans. That’s just what I thought when you’re talking about your creativity. I honestly think, it’s really fascinating. It’s the first time I hear someone talking about it like this.” In his head, Tyler can almost see how little dots, some are thoughts, others are feelings, are forming some kind of connection between each other. ”You are absolutely brilliant, Josh” he blurts out, still captivated with his idea about chlorine. ”Glad,I could give some food to your thoughts and I can only return this compliment, Tyler.” Josh grins, his cheeks taking on a light pink and his eyes squinting in a way, Tyler would describe as purely lovely. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Man, this was sweet, I suprised myself. Anyway I hope you guys like this part. The thing about chlorine really fascinates me and it was fun for me to put it into Tyler's and Josh's conversation.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this one took me a couple days more than usual, but i guess i like how this part turned out. if you watch certain interviews of TØP, you'll totally recognize some dialogues here. even though it's kind of an au, i like to put some real aspects in this story. but maybe i'm just uncreative and too lazy to think of anything new. anyways enjoy! :)

It’s dark outside when Tyler and Josh leave L’Oeillet Rouge, still talking about nothing and everything. ”Dude, how could your mom made you eat bananas for what? A decade?” Josh’s tone is shocked, but with a hint of amusement. ”I don’t know, it’s just gross for me. If I could travel back in time, I would literally punch the guy who first saw a banana and thought ’hmm, I should put that in my mouth’ and I would go ’NO, you will not eat that and none of us will!’” Tyler’s narrative makes Josh laugh that he starts tearing up a little. ”Oh my God, stop please!” Both boys giggle like they were children, not caring about people giving them weird looks while walking by. ”It’s just the truth, right?” Josh is coming down from laughing so much. ”Yeah, the one and only. Anyways, where do you need to go? I thought, maybe … I mean, if you want to I can walk with you until you’re home.” Suddenly, Josh seems nervous, gnawing on his lower lip while looking at Tyler observantly. ”I need to take the 6 Bus up to Franklinton and then walk for like 10 minutes to my house. If that’s not too far away from your place, I would’t mind some company.” Tyler answers, surprised how calm he explains his way home to Josh because internally, he can’t fully realize that Josh wants to walk him home. Like in a real date. ”Sweet, I live in Central Hilltop, so we’re basically neighbours.” Josh returns with a big grin on his face.

Heading towards the next bus station, they are quiet, but it’s calm and Tyler has some time to get some things in his head clear. Throughout the time he has spent with Josh today, the feeling that this is what he imagines a date to be like increases more and more. Tyler doesn’t have any experience of having actual dates, so he struggles to find a good comparison. It’s all so new to him, he’s never had a date before, let alone a boyfriend. Another thing, he worries about are expectations and assumptions. Does he just assume that this is a date right now, but for Josh it’s just new acquaintances meeting for coffee and nothing more. Does Josh expect more of Tyler? Tyler’s head is full of questions, he completely misses Josh’s ”Look, the bus is coming.” Just as the bus stops right in front of them, Tyler jerks up and Josh asks with a bit concern ”You okay?” Nodding, Tyler says ”Yes, uhh I was just in headspace I guess, sorry.” They enter the bus while Josh returns reassuringly ”Don’t worry about it, dude.” The bus is already crowded so there’s nothing else for them but to stand near the exit door in the middle of the vehicle. It seems that every stop after that brings more people in than lets out, so at some point, Tyler and Josh are almost pressed together to give the passengers around them as much space as possible. Every inch closer to Josh makes Tyler more nervous, but not in a bad way. He is so close to him, he can smell his cologne or shampoo and while being as inconspicuous as he can, he tries to inhale this scent as much as possible. There is even a moment in which Tyler feels something on his hip, like a hand ghosting for a few seconds, but as he turns his head to look at Josh, he feels how the hand is moved away. Josh’s face doesn’t give much to interpret into this action, but as Tyler slowly returns his head again towards the door, he sees out of the corner of his eye how Josh bits his lower lip. His doubts and concerns are forgotten for now and Tyler can’t help but smile to himself, glad that Josh can’t see his cheeks blushing. What Tyler doesn’t know is that Josh watches Tyler through the reflection of the door window because of the darkness outside.

After leaving the bus 20 minutes later, they head towards Tyler’s house. Their conversation continues, now about music and how they first got into playing an instrument. ”My mom didn’t know what she could get me for Christmas a couple years ago and she bought me this mini keyboard that could also record stuff. At first I was really confused because no one in my family is musically interested, but then one day I was so bored I dug up this keyboard thing and started tapping on it. When I found out that I can create a tune, a melody or anything like that, that hasn’t been there before, I was just in awe with it. And that’s basically how it all started.” Tyler explains to Josh. ”Do you still have it? This keyboard?” Josh asks curiously and Tyler nods. ”Yeah, but now I have a real piano. It’s used, but it works and I don’t have money to buy a new one anyways.” ”I think in some time I really want to hear you play and sing. Maybe I could bring my drum kit with me if you were up to it…” Josh’s tone is suggestive, but also questioning because he has a feeling that Tyler might not want to share his music with someone he’s just met. It takes a few seconds for Tyler to find an answer. ”I’ve never shown anyone my songs, not even my ideas before.” Nodding Josh returns ”It’s totally okay if you think it’s too early for you to show them. I’m sorry I -” Tyler interrupts him. ”No, actually I really want to show you some of my stuff. I mean, it’s still raw and most of it isn’t finished yet, but my gut feeling tells me that I should give you a glimpse of my ideas. What do you think?” It’s silent for a few seconds, only the sound of their shoe soles on the ground is to be heard. ”I would love to listen to your unfinished songs and raw ideas, Tyler. I know, we know each other just for what? A week, two if the vinyl shop counts. But I have a gut feeling too, that tells me we should at least exchange some thoughts about the music we want to do.”

Arriving at Tyler’s house, Tyler turns to Josh, a little sad, that they have to say goodbye for now. Spending time with Josh is like waking up on a day off in the summer. He’s warm, he is curious and makes you feel like you can do anything you want. There’s no pressure, no judgement, but genuine interest. In a twisted way, Tyler feels like he’s starting to find something he doesn’t know he’s been looking for.  
”This is your place?” Josh asks and Tyler nods affirmatively. ”So uhh, I just want to say that I really enjoyed spending time with you and I hope we can meet again soon. Not just for music, but like in general…” Tyler grins at Josh becoming flustered. He must be just as nervous as him. ”Yeah, me too! I mean, I did enjoy it, too.” Getting a sudden boost of confidence that is so short that he already loses it mid-sentence, Tyler adds ”Do you want to exchange… I mean like uhh… to arrange a new date and anything like that to…”He already forgets how he started that question, but Josh seems to know what Tyler is trying to ask him and quickly responds ”You mean cell numbers? Because yeah, that would be awesome.” Exhaling in relief he confirms Josh and the boys take each other’s phones to set up their contact information. Tyler is so buzzed again, he wants to jump around out of excitement. But he can contain himself. With a lot of self control and the will of not appearing as a total weirdo. He will have time for that later, in his room and all by himself.  
”So… see you soon I guess?” ”Yeah, I hope you get home safe and everything.” Tyler is now right in front of the door, keys in his hand, but still facing Josh who looks like he doesn’t actually want to leave. ”Alright, so … have a good night Josh.” The lock clicks and Tyler is one step inside. ”You too!” Josh returns with a smile and while Tyler slowly shuts the door, he swears he can hear Josh muttering ”Dude, pull yourself together.” Leaning against the door, Tyler lets out a breathe he’s been holding for some reason, closes his eyes and - it seems like a reflex, something his body just does without him having any control about it - grins so much that it would hurt under other circumstances. But in this moment, Tyler feels like nothing can hurt him right now.


	6. Chapter 6

Tyler is staring at his phone. Having Josh’s number now for three days, he is getting more and more nervous to actually text him. For the last days he just didn’t really know how to make the first move and at the same time, he was hoping Josh would do it. But now it’s three days ago since they met and Tyler already misses being in Josh’s presence. If he just had a good idea how he could ask him to hang out, he would have already sent him a message. Being socially awkward isn’t helpful in any way, it just makes the easiest things so much harder. Tyler walks around his room, agitated and restless, too stressed about this task he wants to approach. A part of him knows it shouldn’t be this big of a deal to ask Josh out, but of course he doesn’t listen to it. Instead, he is surrounded by doubts and concerns about Josh being annoyed by Tyler and having better things to do than spending time with him. 

So while pacing around his room, he also looks at his phone every two minutes, just to check if Josh sent him a text already. Which is just a useless side effect of his nervous waiting because he has his phone’s ringtone as loud as possible so wherever he is, he would hear Josh’s text anyway. While the record of ’Day & Age’ starts playing for the third time now Tyler can already hum the melodies along. It’s not enough distraction, but lets him feel being not as crazy as without music. Once again, he goes over his failed attempts to text Josh, a couple drafts swimming in his head. Phrases like ”Hey, what’s up, wanna hang out later?” or ”Hey, how are you? When will you have time to meet again?” and ”How’s it going, you’re free tonight?” They all sound not good enough, too forced and just weird to him. In high school mostly his friends asked him out which he is now very thankful for. Social interaction is already exhausting, but specifically asking for it is even worse for Tyler. But he really wants to see Josh again.  
The moment his phone makes a sudden loud noise, Tyler drops it and shrieks at the same time. ”Seriously?” he mocks himself while grabbing his phone in order to see that Josh has sent him a message. _Hey Tyler, I’m on my way to get Taco Bell and was wondering if you might wanna join me?Sorry if that’s too spontaneous, but I would really like to see you again. So what do you think?  
_Tyler’s heart is pounding in his chest, his hands shaking, almost dropping the phone a second time. How can Josh just ask him like that? How does he make it look so simple? Tyler wonders and feels a little jealous, but is quickly distracted because realization kicks in. Josh wants to see him again. Now to be specific. And even though Tyler is usually not a fan of spontaneous hangouts, he wouldn’t dare to say no to him. Taking deep breaths, he prepares to give a positive answer without being too socially awkward for it. _Haven’t had greasy tacos for a while now, so yeah I’d totally join you. Where are you?_ Josh’s reply is short, but fast. _West Broad Street._ 10 minutes walk for Tyler. His eyes are scanning the room, looking for his wallet and a light jacket, since it’s already dark and chilly outside. _Give me 15 min?_ Tyler starts getting ready when he gets another message from Josh. _Don’t take too long, a dude’s getting hungry._ A giggle escapes Tyler’s mouth, he would give another response, but decides he should rather get going, he suddenly can’t wait to see him again.

As Tyler arrives at the store, Josh is waiting for him outside, wearing the same grey beanie he was wearing when they first met in the vinyl shop. But his hair peaking out looks different. It’s yellow. ”Finally!” Josh cheers and his teeth are showing through his grin once again. ”Oh good, you’re not starved yet, apparently.” Tyler’s comment is smooth to the surprise of him. Entering Taco Bell, Tyler now is really able to see Josh’s hair colour. It’s bright yellow. Before he can stop himself, he says ”Your hair! You dyed it?” Moving his hand to his beanie out of reflex Josh returns ”Yeah, I guess I was just in the mood for yellow, you know? What do you think?” They are right in front of the employee who wants to take their orders. Before Tyler can start his answer, the lady in the typical Taco Bell uniform behind the front desk interrupts them with a bored ”Welcome to Taco Bell, may I take your order?” Not knowing who she’s actually talking to, both boys start talking without thinking. ”Two Cheesy Gordita Crunch tacos, please.” Shocked, they turn towards each other and burst out laughing. ”No way, dude!” Josh already has tears in his eyes while Tyler’s mouth hurts from smiling so much. ”Okay, so like together or separately?” The lady looks at them, waiting for an answer. Date or not, Tyler is not a fan of being in any kind of debt, so before Josh can finish his ”Toge-”, Tyler quickly says ”Separately, please.” A little confused, the lady proceeds their payments and leaves in order to prepare their orders. ”Dude, you totally could’ve let me pay for you!” Feeling just a little bit of guilt, Tyler explains ”I know, it’s just I ugh don’t really like being in dept, you know what I mean?” ”Of course yeah, but you know, what if we just make sure that we pay for each other every other time? So next time, it’s me who pays and after that it’s you.” Tyler hasn’t even thought about next times, but with a light, soft feeling in his body he agrees with Josh. ”Sounds good, I guess.”

After a couple minutes, their orders are finished and Tyler wants to find a table for them when Josh apparently has different plans. ”We’re not eating in here.” He looks sheepish while Tyler’s expression shows pure confusion. ”Huh?” With a nod towards the door, Josh mimics him to follow along. Josh heads outside, walks around two corners until they find themselves on the backside of the building. Wondering what that all means Tyler asks ”Wait, you want to eat here? I mean, we can walk to my place, we really don’t have to eat next to the garbage, dude!” ”Dude, chill. We’re not eating exactly here!” Josh tries to explain, but Tyler is still not convinced. ”You afraid of heights?” Josh’s question seems out of nowhere and Tyler looks even more confused. ”I don’t know, not really I guess. What does that have to do with where we’re about to eat?” The grin is back again. ”You’ll see.” With that, Josh turns around, facing a fire escape ladder and starts climbing up, his paper back of tacos between his teeth so he can use both of his hands. Tyler is speechless, in his head a chaos of thoughts, all about how lucky he feels to know Josh. He puts his bag in between his teeth, carefully so it wouldn’t drop and starts climbing the ladder as well. It’s not too high, since the building only has one main level, but finally on top, you are actually able to have a good view on the surrounding neighbourhood. ”You must be kidding me.” Tyler blurts out in awe and in general captivation of the view. Even though it’s not too late, not many lights are visible, but all the more so the stars above them. Looking in the sky full of little dots of light, something clicks in his head. All the way up to this moment, he has been wondering, if this is just another hangout between friends. Because, that’s what Tyler has assumed them both to be. But now, he realizes that Josh doesn’t see them that way. Though it’s completely new and unknown territory for him, even he knows what this is all about. He’s having a date with Josh right now.  
His face must show a lot of his inner feelings because Josh doesn’t seem as confident as before. A shade of uneasiness spreads out in his eyes and carefully he raises his voice. ”Are you okay with that?” Tyler supposes Josh means more than just the roof and the view, he knows that Josh knows that he knows. ’Don’t say anything stupid’ Tyler admonishes himself internally. ”Absolutely. I - I’m more than okay with that, Josh.” There has been a metaphorical tension built up between them, but now it seems to vanish instantly. ”Okay, so uh… well anyways, I thought this might be a good place to chill and eat. I’ve been up here a couple times and no one goes up here, like ever, so don’t worry about that.” Josh chuckles to himself and bends down to sit on the roof ground, Tyler copying his moves. They unpack their food and start eating, at first only the sound of crunching and rustling paper is to be heard. Soon though, Josh makes a comment about Tyler’s loud chewing and that leads to a whole conversation about their bad habits. ”Okay, so I don’t really see why this should be a _bad_ habit, but my siblings are always complaining about that, so I’ll tell you anyways. When I come out of the shower, I like my body to to air-dry. So I mean, I still use a towel, but sometimes my shirt might stick to my shoulders or whatever some minutes after. I don’t mind though, but it seems to drive them nuts.” Josh laughs and Tyler does too, but automatically, he imagines what Josh just described to him and decides that this is anything but _bad_ in his personal opinion _._ ”There’s definitely worse.” Tyler agrees with a chuckle and takes the last bite of his second taco. Exhaling deeply, he straightens his legs und lies down, his hood of his jacket is a thin pillow for now. Josh does so likewise, but takes off his beanie to put it under his head. Both boys look up into the sky, a short silence exists, but both just take comfort in being in each others presence.

Tyler is the one who turns away first. Instead, he’s looking at Josh, his profile to be exact. His nose ring shines weakly in the dim light of a lantern around the corner of the block. His hair is curly, the yellow a clear contrast to the dark ground. It looks soft, Josh must have showered before. Being so close, Tyler can smell his shampoo, something fruity, he recons. He watches his chest rise and lowerin a steady rhythm. But his gaze wanders to the yellow hair again. ”I like your hair” Tyler comments, but seems absent even though he directly looks at Josh. Turning his head, Josh’s eyes searches Tyler’s. ”Thanks. You don’t think the colour is too prominent or something?” A slight concern is carried in his voice as he speaks out the question. ”No, I’m a fan of bright things. I like yellow. But I liked red, too.” Tyler snickers softly, making Josh chuckle and his cheeks turn into a light pink. ”Maybe I’ll come back to red later. As long as my hair is not completely dead by then. You know the chemicals, they are not really what you would call healthy for my hair. But for now, I trick myself into thinking it’s fine ’cause it feels all soft and fluffy. I just dyed it this morning.”All inhibition and shyness seem to leave Tyler for two seconds. He uses this rare, special moment to askJosh ”Can I touch it?” Gulping, Tyler already blushes because of embarrassment. But Josh just grins like it’s Christmas, lets out a breathless ”Yeah, sure” and scoots closer to the other boy until they are just inches apart. Tyler’s head is so overwhelmed, he thinks at some point, he starts acting on autopilot. While slowly moving his left hand toward Josh’s head, he never breaks eye contact with him. Tyler’s hand then lowers onto the right side of his head, his fingers reaching the curls that are indeed soft and fluffy. For a few seconds, Tyler lets his fingers hover over Josh’s hair only, but thinking he wants more. So he lets his fingers spread out and moves his hand until it’s flat on the back of Josh’s head. Still looking into each other’s eyes, their breathings simultaneously quicken, but somehow find the same rhythm. Tyler feels like he’s in trance and continues to move his fingers in the yellow softness. Sometimes it’s just his fingers grazing over Josh’s scalp, or he takes a single curl between two fingers and swirls it for a while. Lost in this moment of infinite calmness and satisfaction, they don’t notice how both of them start speaking at the same time again this evening. ”It feels good.” It’s just a quiet whisper and both only smile at the coincidence, but otherwise don’t move. Tyler’s heart is pounding through his body, he thinks that Josh must feel his pulse through his hand on his head. Maybe he even does, as he just leans more and more into the touch. 

Laying under a sky full of tiny little dots of light and still looking deep into Josh’s eyes, Tyler starts to believe that Josh might be a reason to look forward to getting old. Because he never wants this moment to end. In his head, Tyler creates a couplet and instantly likes the sound of it.

”I used to say ’I want to die before I’m old’  
But because of you I might think twice”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i don't know how i managed to do this part, i really hope you like it and have at least half as much fun as i did while writing it. that would be already enough for me.


	7. Chapter 7

”As awesome as it is being here with you now, you don’t plan on spending the whole night on this roof top, are you?” Tyler almost feels bad to break the soothing silence between them, but he just wants to know if Josh has other plans. A giggle escapes his mouth. ”No actually not. Do wanna go home?” Thinking for a moment, Tyler debates with himself whether to call it a night or - and that’s already his favourite - try to spend as much time as he can with Josh. ”I don’t really feel like leaving you right now. I gotta stick around, you know. What about you?” His response is quick and makes Tyler smile. ”Me too. Do you have some place you want to go next? Or maybe we can just take a walk in the neighbourhood and decide from there.” Josh moves until he is in a sitting position, looking down at Tyler. The lack of a close light makes it hard to make out their facial expressions, so Tyler sits up as well. ”Hmm, I don’t know, I would -” His parents aren’t home, he realizes. His brothers too. They all happen to be at a basketball game in Cincinnati. And they will spend the night at his grandparents’. Maddy is still at home, but she never leaves her room on the top floor. So Tyler can interrupt himself without any concerns ”Wait, I got an idea! We can go to my place, I have all my music stuff down in the basement and … I mean if you want I can show you…” Suddenly he gets so nervous about this suggestion, gets worried that inviting Josh to his home is a couple steps too early. But Josh just returns ”Yeah, I mean I’d love to hear you play and sing. But what about your family? It’s like kinda late, isn’t it? Won’t they be mad?” His face shows an expression of concern and confusion, so Tyler quickly explains the situation with his family tonight. Josh tries to keep his excitement as small as as possible, but can’t prevent his smile that makes his eyes squint. ”Alright, let’s go then. I can’t wait to listen to you!” A blush creeps on Tyler’s face as he begins to stand up. 

Meeting a person twice in one week usually wears Tyler out pretty much, introversion at its best. Back in high school, he would even try to find excuses to not join his team mates to group meetings every other night because at the same time, he didn’t want to be rude and just say no. So after some time, he has become pretty good at avoiding social interaction with peers, except for occasional hangouts with his friends. But with Josh, he doesn’t feel socially exhausted, there’s no lack of energy. In fact, the more Tyler is with him, the more energetic he feels. Josh is like a charger or fuel for him because he gets him going. 

Together, they climb down the ladder and Tyler leads the way to his home. Lost in his thoughts, he tries to find songs that he wants to show Josh. On one hand, he is afraid that most of those songs are too dark-themed and depressing. But on the other hand, he should at least give it a chance, he believes that Josh is genuinely interested and won’t judge him too hard. 

”I can’t tell if my sister is still awake or not, so let’s pretend she’s sleeping. We’ll go to the basement anyways and her room is on the top floor, so we are probably not gonna wake her up.” Tyler explains while they step on the porch as he grabs his keys to open the front door. ”Sweet” is Josh’s short whispered answer. Inside, they take off their shoes and Tyler turns around asking ”Do you want anything to drink? Sadly I don’t have a mini fridge down there. Yet.” He snickers and Josh says amusedly ”Soda would be fine, dude.” They head towards the kitchen, Tyler grabbing two cans of soda out of the fridge and Josh standing under the door frame, looking around with a curious expression. Tyler walks towards Josh, the latter not noticing that he wants to pass him and simultaneously Tyler doesn’t notice that. It ends in them awkwardly bumping into each other that leaves both turning into blushing messes. ”I thought you would step aside.” whispers Tyler with a chuckle. ”Oh, yeah, uhh sorry, I was - uhm - distracted.” Josh sounds confused, but Tyler wants to know more. ”What got you so out of it, man? The kitchen is not that impressive, is it?” Looking down Josh murmurs more to himself ”No, but someone else is.” Not knowing how to react Tyler decides to huff and turn around heading towards the basement. It turns out that not only has Tyler his musical equipment down here, but it also seems like a guest room because of the sheeted mattress in one of the back corners. In the other one is a wooden piano and a stool. The walls are covered in shelves, some of them caring basketball trophies, others are displaying books and cds. Josh notices the noice cancelling foam pieces on the walls left and right to him. He points to them asking ”How loud do you usually get that you need those?” It is meant in a joking way, but Tyler gets that he is serious. ”You would guess that just because I play the piano, I’m not as noisy as some other musicians, but sometimes I need to scream, to be honest.” Again, the tone seems to be intended jokingly, but Tyler is as serious as Josh. 

Handing one can over, Tyler steps to the piano, puts his one onto the wood and turns to Josh. ”So uhm - I wrote this without knowing a title for it and I still have no idea. So if you have something in mind, let me know.” Tyler seems nervous, his fingers are constantly fluttering. ”What’s it about?” Josh wonders while watching Tyler thinking about an answer. ”You’ll see.” Tyler gulps and takes one last glance at Josh, who looks at him expectantly. 

Whatever Josh has been expecting since the moment he knew he would hear Tyler play and sing, it all crashes down when the first words are sung. Well no, rapped.

”I wake up fine and dandy but then by the time I find it handy  
To rip my heart apart and start  
Planning my crash landing  
I go up, up, up, up, up to the ceiling  
Then I feel my soul start leaving  
Like an old man's hair receding  
I'm pleading, please, oh please  
On my knees repeatedly asking  
Why it's got to be like this  
Is this living free?  
I don't wanna be the one be the one to have the sun's blood on my hands  
I'll tell the moon  
Take this weapon, forged in darkness  
Some see a pen, I see harpoon” 

It’s so fast Josh has to concentrate to understand Tyler’ words. The rhythm is rapid, he can’t imagine to hold it on a piano, but he knows that it affords a lot of skill to do it on the drums. As the pre-chorus starts the mood shifts from burdensome and dark to uplifting and more energetic. Josh feels the urge to move. Not only move but to join Tyler. He has a beat in his head, he wants to know what it’s like to connect it with Tylers piano. There are no drums in the basement, but Josh finds an empty wooden crate. Tyler doesn’t notice how Josh quickly leaves his spot next to him and comes back with the wooden piece. Taking a seat on it, Josh carefully listens to Tyler who seems to be now in the main chorus of the song. The second verse is coming up and Josh manages to start a matching beat by slapping on his makeshift cajón box.

Tyler almost stumbles upon the fast words he’s rapping when he hears Josh. Hence he can play this song on the piano without notes, he is able to turn his head for a few seconds to see Josh playing ”drums” and with a lot of control he tries to keep his upcoming smile to himself. After the second verse, the pre and main chorus are repeated, leading into the outro as the finale. The last note Tyler plays seems to last forever between him and Josh. Both are taking big breaths, not only because of the physical effort. It’s more like being on a hike, you are wandering around for years without knowing your destination, but suddenly you are not alone and you reach the top of the mountain. The view down is what gives you this feeling of lightness, of infinite possibility and more important, of what you have already achieved. That’s all Tyler is feeling when he stares at Josh speechlessly while he reciprocates his stare right back. 

Josh is the first one to break the silence. ”And you - uhm - don’t have a title for it yet?” Tyler shakes his head ”I want the title to mean something more, I guess. That’s why I don’t just pick any words out of the chorus. What do you think about it? Like the tempo changes and everything, I mean I know it’s a lot and probably confusing for people. But in my head, I have this vision of playing this song on stage and I imagine looking at the audience and they just _get it_.” Nodding Josh returns ”You know, I think I get it. And right in the middle of the song, I got this idea for a drum beat, so I just had to turn this crate into some sort of percussion.” His teeth are showing again, he smiles excitedly. Tyler joins him and says ”I heard it, that was so cool! Do you think, you can do it again? I could show you more. I mean only if you want to…” ”Of course, dude! And I just wanna say that it means a lot to me that you show me your stuff. Like, I get why you don’t want your family to know this yet, but I also think it’s worth to be listened to. You’re a really good songwriter, Tyler.” Josh’s voice is calm, but has this hint of admiration which makes Tyler blush furiously. ”I uhh, don’t really know… like how to -” Josh laughs lightly and interrupts him, much to Tyler’s relief. ”You’re welcome. So you gonna show me more?” 

With every song, Tyler wants to show Josh more, wants to play and sing more, wants to write more and more. Josh makes it look so easy to find a fitting beat for every song, at some point Tyler stops in the middle of a song called “Guns For Hands” just call out dramatically “How are you able to just do that? I mean I need weeks, even months for melodies or lyrics and you just - you just freaking nail all those beats in your first try!” Josh is startled, but laughs it off saying ”I don’t know, I mean I’m glad you like it! But on my side, I think it’s really cool that you put so much effort in your songs and works.” Blushing, Tyler turns back around to his piano to continue the rest of ”Guns For Hands”.

It’s been hours since the boys started playing, now at 2:30 am, they are getting tired and at have already changed from the piano and the ”drum crate” to the mattress where they are now sitting criss- crossed facing each other. ”Do you need to work tomorrow?” Tyler asks after looking at the time on his cd-player on a shelf. ”You mean today?” Josh returns sheepishly. Rolling his eyes Tyler nods. ”No I don’t. Do you?” Josh lets his neck crack while he speaks. Fortunately, Tyler finds the noice weirdly nice. He starts to copy his actions and answers a short ”Me neither” between two cracks. It’s silent for a few moments, Tyler and Josh are both lost in their thoughts, but at the same time they are in the same head space. With curiosity and genuine admiration, they study one another by watching each other. While Josh looks at Tyler’s face - his pupils that are widened because of tiredness, his mouth that has cute, chapped lips and that can let out the prettiest sounds Josh has ever heard - Tyler’s eyes are glued on Josh’s arms - his right tattooed arm that shows beautiful colours and muscles underneath it that make him look strong and fit. Tyler imagines how those two arms would fit perfectly around his figure and how his chin and neck would lay snuggly on Josh’s shoulder. Josh exits his head space first, now an almost sad-looking expression on his face. ”I guess, it’s time to go to bed. You look pretty tired too, dude.” Tyler has completely ignored his lack of energy until now. But even though he knows both of them need to sleep eventually, he still doesn’t want Josh to leave. And Tyler would ask him to stay for the night, but thinks it might be too early to propose that. Tyler is completely startled by Josh’s next response ”I wouldn’t mind spending the night here.” His face is lit up, while Tyler’s turns into an expression of shock. ”Did I just speak that last thought out loud?” ”Yep” Josh returns, popping the ’p’. ”Oh, no that happens sometimes when I’m tired, oh god, I’m so sorry I shouldn’t- ”Now Josh is unabashedly laughing at Tyler. ”Dude, you really are tired, aren’t you? As I said, I wouldn’t mind spending the night. Maybe I’m just lazy because my way home would probably just take like 15 minutes, but since you are technically offering…” Tyler doesn’t know whether he should thank his sleep-deprived brain to let this accident happen or to curse it. Anyway, Josh has said yes and that’ all that matters right now. 

”Okay, I mean that’s cool. I uhm, can I get you anything? Like an extra pillow, or PJs or water or-” Suddenly nervousness hits him and he babbles without taking a breath, so Josh has to interrupt him. ”Tyler, if you don’t mind, I would just take what’s already down here. These pillows and comforter, perfectly fine. But if you have a spare toothbrush I wouldn’t mind.” Pointing at said objects, Josh makes it clear, that Tyler doesn’t need to stress about that. ”Okay, uhm - I guess we can go upstairs, so I can show you the bathroom and give you a toothbrush.” They stand up and walk to the stairs. Tyler can’t believe how he has managed to have Josh spend the night at his place. Entering the master bathroom, he shows Josh where he can help himself with a toothbrush and toothpaste. Tyler however grabs his stuff and says ”I’ll use the other bathroom downstairs, so when you’re done, you can just go back to the basement.” Josh thanks him with a small smile and closes the door as soon as Tyler is outside. Exhaling louder than he actually needs to, he takes a few seconds to collect himself. 

Josh enters the basement when Tyler is already there, sitting on the mattress. The pillows and the comforter are now neatly placed and folded. ”Dude, you don’t have to play hotel for me!” Josh chuckles which makes Tyler smile too. ”You’re my guest and my hospitality is anchored in my blood. So deal with it.” He responds with a small, but amused pout. ”Anyways, I guess I’ll sleep like a baby because this looks really comfortable. And thanks again for letting me stay.” With a huff, Josh joins Tyler on the bed. Instead of reacting to Josh, Tyler is quiet. In his head his thoughts are swimming once again. _Should I ask him? Would it be too much? I don’t wanna leave. I wanna stay with him._ Josh doesn’t seem to notice Tyler’s inner struggle, so he continues asking when Tyler plans to wake up and if he needs to set an alarm. No response. No movement, but Josh assumes though, since he is about to say good night to Tyler. But Tyler doesn’t move. He looks exhausted and seems more tired than before. Now Josh gets concerned. ”Dude, you look really tired, why don’t you go to your bedroom and make sure to reach the bed before you fall asleep in front of your door or something.” Tyler swallows, back in reality looking at Josh. ”Maybe I’m just lazy.” Perplexed Josh only lets out a confused ”Huh?” _You can do it, just ask him_ ”Maybe I’m too lazy to go all the way up to my bedroom. So if _you_ wouldn’t mind, I uhm, I can just - you know…” _Nope, that ain’t it._ Tyler is lost in his words, doesn’t know how to form words that could express his wish or proposal. Lucky for him, Josh is able to understand him despite his difficulties. Instead of talking, Josh just starts laying down on the right side of the bed, lifting the comforter to cover his body except for his chest and upwards. Then he turns to Tyler who watched him quietly, not sure what Josh wants him to do. Lifting the comforter again, Josh nods towards his left side, the empty side of the bed and murmurs softly ”C’mere.” Tyler swallows again, unable to say anything, but slowly moves his body towards Josh and a few moments later, he is laying next to him. Josh quickly turns around to turn off the light before he moves back to face Tyler. While Tyler’s head has been full of questions and concerns, it is now almost empty except for a feeling of closeness. He’s never been this close to someone he likes so much. He’s never been this calm, even though he was so nervous, just seconds ago. Josh makes him relax and be comfortable. ”Are you okay?” Josh asks, his voice is nothing but soothing. Nodding, Tyler returns a quiet ”Never been better. G’night Josh. Thanks for asking me to join you tonight.” _It was probably the best night of my life._ Josh smiles, wishing him a good night as well.


	8. Chapter 8

The first thing Tyler notices is the warmth surrounding him, full of comfort and safety. The next one is a smell. Fruity shampoo he remembers, but it’s not as strong as he first smelled it back up on the roof top lying next to the source of it. Now it’s more mixed with the source’s natural body odour, which might be even better. The last thing he feels before opening his eyes is a breathing figure under his right arm, pressed to his chest. Calm and steady, like the heart he feels beating inside the body he’s halfway embracing.

Yellow curls are just a couple inches away from his face when Tyler opens his eyes. Though, his mind is still in the process of waking up, he quickly remembers last night, how they ate tacos on the roof top of Taco Bell, how he touched Josh’s soft hair - without hesitance, he moves his face forward until he can feel the softness again -, how they played music here in Tyler’s basement and how happy he was when Josh agreed on spending the night with Tyler.

He stays like this for a few more minutes, trying to save this moment so he can memorize it for later. But in some way he feels kind of creepy because Josh is still asleep which leads him to slowly detach himself out of bed. After a short visit in the closest bathroom, Tyler comes back to the basement and heads towards his piano, Josh still in the same position as before. His notebook is in his lap, showing an unfinished poem. While he reads those lines over and over, he places his fingers on the keys, still aware that Josh is not up yet, so when he starts pressing down, he tries to be as quite as possible. In his head, Tyler relives the moment when he wrote those words and tries to connect them with the melody he thinks seems to suit them best.

 

”I know  
Where you stand  
Silent  
In the trees  
And that's  
Where I am  
Silent  
In the trees“ 

 

It was the day, he met Josh coincidently in the forest of the Highbanks Metro Park. The day he realized that it is possible to have someone to talk to without getting exhausted because of your introversion. He definitely wants to go to the forest again, especially to the clearing with the small pond and the sunshine peaking through the woods. And he wants Josh to join him.

More words start to come up, so now he changes from the lines he already has to new ones.

”Why won't you speak?  
Where I happen to be  
Silent  
In the trees  
Standing cowardly”

At some point, he wonders why he creates lyrics filled with desperation and concerns when he actually should feel fine. But sometimes reality doesn’t feel believable enough, too good to be true. Despite knowing that Josh is right there still lying in bed a couple feet away from him and somehow Tyler can’t believe he’s here. Can’t get a hold of the possible chance that he could spend not only one night with him, but years if he was lucky. And if Josh were to want that too, of course. Even though he is so young, barely an adult, he has been thinking about getting old and dying way too much, probably. For so long, he could only see the negative aspects: increasing physical reduction, decomposition of one’s personalty in case there is a form of dementia or loneliness in case of friends and family being dead already. When he would imagine his future, Tyler didn’t see anyone next to him, as a lover or even as a platonic soul mate. It’s not that he doesn’t believe in the concept of soul mates in life, but Tyler has never thought that there would be one for him, nor could he think of himself as such. 

”I can feel your breath  
I can feel my death  
I want to know you  
I want to see  
I want to say  
Hello”

While Tyler plays this part over and over in order to find the best accents, Josh wakes up and turns over to see Tyler playing softly on the piano. He already has a feeling that Tyler is so deep in head space, so focused on his music, that’s why he isn’t surprised anymore when he steps out of bed, visiting the bathroom like Tyler did before, to come back to him not noticing any of Josh’s moves. Instead of going to bed again, he walks up to Tyler’s stool, standing inches behind him so he can glance over his head and shoulders, onto the notebook and Tyler’s fingers, still tapping carefully on the keys. Not wanting to scare the boy in front of him, Josh moves slowly and thoughtful when he lowers his upper body in order to place his chin on Tyler’s head. Meanwhile his hands rise up to his shoulders until his palms touch the fabric of Tyler’s shirt. Resting like this, Josh just listens to Tyler who naturally notices Josh’s presence behind him, but doesn’t stop playing since he might have found the way he wants the verse he has in his head to sound like. And the more Josh listens to the melody, the more he learns it, so at some point he hums in sync with Tyler. The humming causes vibrations in Josh’s neck that is touching Tyler’s head and Tyler can feel them. Eventually, he stops playing and so does Josh’s humming. He is the one who talks first. ”Morning.” Voice still rough with sleep, but he doesn’t move his position. Tyler wouldn’t want him to, if was honest. ”Hey” he answers, his voice wavers slightly. Looking down on the notebook, Josh asks if the song was a new one. ”Partly. Been having the first verse since the day I met you in the forest in Highbanks, you remember? The other part, perhaps a chorus, is improvised.” Josh nods shortly and nuzzles his nose in Tyler’s hair. Chuckling Tyler speaks softly “That tickles, Josh.” Nose still touching hair, Josh murmurs a quiet “Should I move?” Even though he can’t see it fully, he can still make out how Tyler’s mouth forms into a big smile. “No, you can stay like this as long as you want.” He exhales.

After a couple minutes of more hair nuzzling and lips almost touching Tyler’s neck’s skin, the boys decide to have a snack consisting of cereal. As Josh asks when Tyler’s family will be back, the latter takes a look on the clock closest to him and realizes that it’s supposed to be in half an hour already. They spend their remaining time together as they get ready, brushing teeth in the master bathroom and Tyler can’t help when he watches Josh to tell him jokingly “I didn’t take you for the aggressive teeth brusher!” After spitting out the rest of the tooth paste into the sink Josh turns to Tyler. “Those teeth need intensive care, dude! Gotta make the dentist proud, right?” While he shows his set of teeth in all its glory, Tyler tries his best to aim his rest of tooth paste into the sink as well before he spits it out, immediately bursting into laughter after that.

As Josh puts on his clothes from the night before, Tyler quickly changes into fresh and comfy clothing. When they arrive at the front door, Josh turns around to face the other boy one more time. “Thanks again for letting me stay. And I’d like to... you know... repeat it some time soon.” He states with a small smile. Tyler copies the smile and returns that he would like that too. Even though he is aware that they have already shared more intimate touches, he is still not sure if hugging Josh would be okay or not. Maybe Josh can read minds, at least that’s what Tyler wonders for a second when Josh opens his arms and takes a step forward to take him to his chest. Both of their chins are resting on the other’s shoulder for a moment, both of them have their eyes closed as well. “You gonna text me when you have time, okay?” Josh murmurs not leaving the embracement. Tyler lets out a quiet “Absolutely” as an answer. Slowly they separate from each other and Josh turns again to open the door. “Come home safe” Tyler says as a goodbye. “Will do. See you around, I guess.” Josh replies before heading outside.

As he closes the door, Tyler takes a big breath, only now completely realizing what happened for the last twelve hours


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm not dead, just had a writing block over the last month.

__ As weeks go by, Tyler and Josh have a couple more hangouts at Taco Bell and L’Oeillet Rouge, as well as more music sessions in which they show each other their ideas and visions. After hours of playing piano and drums, the atmosphere around the boys is filled with passion and admiration for one another. So it’s no surprise for them when they look up one night - in Josh’s room this time - and realize they have created so much songs, it would be enough to put up a show. ”Do you really think people would come and listen to this? I mean, most of it is still kinda, I don’t know, depressing... raw?” In skepticism, Tyler fiddles with the hem of his hoodie while Josh turns away from his drum kit to face the other boy. ”Dude, think about playing in front of a crowd. Maybe 30 people, or 100 or 15,000. And there’ll always be people who have no idea who we are and what we do. But when those people listen to you, to us - for some reason they can relate. They know what we are talking about and they realize they’re not alone with bad thoughts. The idea ofpeople out there who understand what we try to tell, seriously I get so excited, you wouldn’t believe it!” Completely in awe, Tyler stares at Josh. That was exactly what he needed. Because thinking about it, he can constitute a connection. Whenever he was struggling, music helps him. Not necessarily with giving advice, but more with just being there. Sad music doesn’t make him sadder per se, but it just makes him realize every time that he’s not alone and it’s okay to speak about it. But still he sometimes feels like it’s not enough. More artists should open up in his opinion. So why not start? 

”You’re right. But dude, don’t think it’ll be easy to sing about all that stuff, okay?” Unlike Tyler’s expectation, Josh huffs. ”Dude, you wanna know what I think about whenever I hear you sing?” Even though his mouth is curved in a bright smile, Tyler is not entirely sure, if he wants to know the answer. But either way, he nods quietly. ”I think, you’re the strongest person I ever met. And not only are you still alive, but you turn your demons into something amazing. Something that can help others, as I said. And on top of that, you’re so talented, I mean it! You are so good with words, you can either explain the most complex things in such simple ways or you hide the real meaning of what you’re saying behind all those metaphors, but people will get the it anyways. I mean, I have little to no idea of songwriting, but I still can see the potential you cary. It’s a ton, dude! So yeah, I guess all I’m trying to say is, that I’m here for the long shot. Even if we’re just playing shows for no more than 100 people for the rest of our lives, but my actual vision about this whole music thing we have is that we won’t stop until we have sold out stadium tours. And when we’ll ever get to that point, we just continue until we die. At least that’s my plan. What about you?” While he was speaking, he leaves his drum kit and walks to his bed, where Tyler sits cross-legged, deeply focused on what Josh explains. Towards the end, his tone turns from motivating to almost challenging.  
Tyler is moveless until Josh kneels next to him on the bed, his knees touching Tyler’s right thigh lightly. As he turns his head, he looks into Josh’s eyes. There’s no hesitance when Tyler immediately opens his arms in order for Josh to lean into the hug. Josh chuckles when Tyler nuzzles his whole face into his shoulder, his hands meanwhile on the boy’s back, drawing circles as a soothing gesture.   
Nothing has to be said, Tyler wouldn’t even know how to express his overwhelming emotions to Josh. For the next few minutes they don’t move, just breathe in each other’s sent. Eventually they set their focus back on music and how it would be possible to play a show somewhere in Columbus. 

Tyler eventually leaves for dinner at home, after hours of brainstorming. Not even ten minutes into dinner and suddenly Tyler’s phone vibrates in his pocket. Trying to be sneaky, he takes it out under the table to see that Josh sent him a new message. _Are you having dinner already? I just remembered we have nothing at home to eat and the last snack left like 20 minutes ago :( What should I do now??_ Three seconds are required for Tyler to really understand the meaning, five more to re-read the text and more than 60 to come down from a coughing fit, caused by a piece of broccoli. Everyone at the table has a concerned expression on their face and totally out of breath, the boy tries to let out a ”I’m fine”. As he starts breathing normally, his dad chuckles as he says ”Must’ve been a nasty piece, right?” Lucky for Tyler, he hasn’t taken another bite yet, but he still blushes furiously and mutters ”Yeah, probably” into his father’s direction.

After everyone is done and ready to take the dishes to the dishwasher, Tyler is the first to drop his off in the kitchen. Taking two steps at once, he sprints in his room, finally some privacy in which he can respond to Josh. _Dinner is over, i think i almost died because of broccoli. So be careful what you get yourself._ Tyler decides, Josh doesn’t particularly need to know what happened. As he changes into sweat pants and an old shirt, Tyler sees his phone’s screen lit up, another text of Josh. _No broccoli for me tonight, got it!_ They continue texting for a couple more hours, laughing about the worst puns and philosophize about the infinity of space.

Long after midnight, Tyler’s eyelids keep dropping every 30 seconds at this point, so with slight reluctance, he sends his last message to Josh. _I wish I could talk to your longer, but my body tries to force me to sleep. So good night, I guess. See you later!_ A couple seconds pass by, but no text from Josh, so Tyler assumes he might be already sleeping. Grabbing his charging cable, he puts his phone down on the nightstand and reaches for the small lamp next to him to turn it off. Just as he starts to fully lay down, the sound of his vibrating phone makes him twitch. Because it keeps vibrating, the sign that someone is calling him in the middle of the night. With a shaky hand, he reaches for his phone, only to see that Josh’s caller ID is showing on the bright screen. Usually, Tyler hates phone-calls, but since it is Josh, he can’t just turn it off. ”He- Hello?” Tyler stutters. Josh on the other end of the line returns ”Oh good, you’re still up!” sounding unexpectedly relieved. But Tyler is still very tired so he asks Josh if something was wrong. They don’t usually call each other and they’ve just seen one another a couple hours ago. ”Uh, no I’m fine. I’m fine. I just uh wanted to wish you a good night too…?” He lets his last words sound like a questions, as if he wasn’t sure if it would be alright to say such a phrase. Getting more and more confused, Tyler furrows his brows. ”Uhm okay, I- I guess. Is there a reason you had to call me just for that? I mean a text with that would be totally fine too, you know?” As he’s speaking, he hopes, that Josh doesn’t take it as harsh, as he thinks it sounds. There’s a few seconds of silence before Josh speaks again. And with every word, he seems to become more flustered. ”Yeah, yeah, I know that… I just wanted to uhm… Ijustwantedtohearyourvoice.” That last part comes out so fast and mumbly, Tyler - in his state of half sleep - is not able to understand it. ”Josh, I-” he yawns ”-Can you repeat that last sentence?” Josh’s microphone takes up the big breath he just takes before he speaks that last part one more time, slower so Tyler can get it. More seconds of silence before he returns slightly confused ”We just hung out today…?” Josh on the other site of the line chuckles. ”I know, Ty. If I’m being honest… I guess I kinda missed the sound. Of your voice I mean.” While Tyler’s face turns into various shades of pink, he starts to giggle. ”I must be dreaming” he huffs out, speaking more to himself than to Josh. ”Why do you think you’re dreaming, dude?” His smile is so bright, you can hear it through the phone. Tyler’s giggle almost stops before he speaks again, an undertone of disbelief in his tone. ”Because something like this only happens in my dreams.” Now, it is Josh who starts to giggle and blush. ”Okay, I don’t want to keep you from your sleep any longer. So… good night Ty.” His voice is soft, practically lulling Tyler to sleep. There is a small voice mumbling ”Good night, Joshie” before the call is ended.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> the next chapter is probably the last one. anyways, i hope you enjoyed this one.


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm glad to finally finish this story, enjoy this chapter. I'm already figuring out my next work. But for now this one is done.
> 
> Song recommendation: Summer Days - Kai Engel

’Death Cab for Cutie’ is to be heard in the background as Tyler holds his head outside the window of the passenger seat of Josh’s car, the headwind playing with his hair. As spring goes on, he enjoys going outside more and more. And with Josh, it’s even better. Despite the fact, that Tyler has no idea, where Josh at the wheel is intending to drive. ”Are you sure, you don’t want to tell me where we’re going?” Tyler turns to Josh, a small smile on his lips and a not so small sparkle in his eyes. The latter answers, eyes never leaving the road in front of him. ”Nope, it’s a surprise!” He has a smile too. ”Not to dumb your plans, but I know the route, Josh! It’s leading to Highbanks, we met there once. I mean, it’s still a nice place…” Feeling a little ungrateful, Tyler stops speaking, although he really thinks that it’s a nice gesture of Josh. ”I know, dude, don’t worry. Just be patient.” Now there’s a smirk on his face, which makes Tyler to pout. 

After a couple of miles, Josh immediately finds a parking lot right next to the entree of the park. Other than Tyler who starts to walk straight to the gate, Josh opens the trunk in order to take out a rolled-up picnic blanket and a blank bag. Soon enough, the younger boy turns around and watches as the other walks up to him. ”So picnic is the surprise?” He points on the items in Josh’s arm as he speaks. Still smirking, Josh just returns ”Part of it, yeah” and nods to the gate to move on. ”So there’s more?” Tyler doesn’t get an answer, just another chuckle of Josh. A few minutes into walking and silently enjoying the walk through the forrest, Tyler starts to smell something familiar, but can’t place it exactly. It hits him while Josh readjusts the bag he’s holding. So out of nowhere, Tyler lets out an excited ”Dude, you brought TacoBell for a picnic?!” Under a wholehearted laugh, Josh nods and explains how he knows that a three-course meal is not their thing, so TB it shall be.

Arriving at the side trail next to the main one, neither of them has to say a word, they just turn and head towards the clearing where they once met coincidently. Just before the trail ends, it gets so narrow that Josh steps in front of Tyler to give them both more space to walk. But suddenly Josh stops, so abruptly that Tyler almost walks right into him. ”What’s up?” He asks confused as he can’t see anything except Josh. Said boy turns his head, his eyes wandering over the other’s face, looking for any sign of doubt or discomfort. His brows furrow slightly. ”It’s nothing, just wanted to make sure that… that you want to be here as much as I do, you know?” Tyler sees a shadow of uncertainty in Josh’s expression, so he tries to be as convincing as possible. His eyes wander over his face before fixating in the other’s pupils. ”Everything. I mean it means everything for me to be here with you, Josh.” It ends up more in a whisper, but Josh gets every word and instead of this little bit of uncertainty, there is genuine excitement now. ”Okay” he giggles and moves on, letting Tyler finally have a view of the field with the sparkling pond in the middle of the clearing. It’s not possible to overlook the fact that something is different. The moment, he realizes, his jaw drops and he can’t do anything, but admire the beauty in front of him. It turns out that in the time between now and his last visit, dozens of flowers have grown, spreading out onto to whole field around the pond. They look like they have just achieved their climax of blossoming because they shine in the brightest red one can just imagine. After seconds of silence, Tyler tears his gaze apart from the field and looks for Josh’s eyes. Those are staring right back. It takes a couple more seconds when Tyler finds his voice, again it’s nothing but a whisper ”Are those…?” ”Red carnations, yeah” Josh finishes, whispering too.

”I-I-I’m confused! I think…I-I mean what is -uhm- did you-” Tyler gestures broadly at everything in his sight. “Yeah, it was me” Josh blushes and automatically moves his right arm to the back of his head, fiddling with the short locks of his washed-out yellow hair. “After we were in L’Oeillet Rouge, I did some research and thought that you’d maybe like red carnations. I planted the seeds two days after that.” He unfolds the blanket in his arms for both to sit down and starts to unpack the bag of tacos. As Tyler kneels down to join Josh he marvels about how astonishing the view is. Not just the flowers, but how Josh thought about Tyler’s favourite place in his hometown and how he could combine that with his favourite spot. For a few minutes the boys just eat in silence and enjoy the surrounding noises. Birds chirping in the treetops, leaves rustling with every wind gust and even squirrels squeaking afield. It is the perfect idyllic scenery one just might find in a storybook.  
Josh is the first one to speak again. ”Do you know that every flower has a different meaning?” Tyler looks up, thinking for a second. ”I’ve heard of it, but never actually looked anything up. Have you?” Putting the discarded packages of their food aside, Josh moves so his legs lay straight on the blanket, his upper body propped up on his arms. As he seems to be comfortable again, he looks at Tyler, then down on his lap. Back at Tyler. Back on his lap. Tyler watches Josh’s changing glances. He might get what Josh wants him to do, but has to look into his eyes one more time to make sure. As Josh nods, it is all Tyler needs to move up from his cross-legged seat, closer to the other boy until he can lay down on his back. His head in Josh’s lap. There is a brief moment in which both locked eyes, before Tyler’s close. He can feel how Josh takes a deep breath. ”It’s usually about feelings. The red carnation for example has multiple connections to love and admiration. I’ve read about fascination and luck too. See, a light red represents friendship, whereas a deep red colour goes along with romantic affection.” Tyler hums, eyes still closed. As Josh continues, he moves his right hand to the head in his lap, his palm on soft hair first, spreading his fingers out to reach Tyler’s scalp eventually. ”It’s even the state flower of Ohio. However, I think it’s interesting how accurate those meanings can be. In this case, I feel like the carnations around us are emitting their meaning. So, uhm… I’m trying to tell you… Gosh I’m so bad a this, I’m sorry. I mean that I- I feel like, like a red carnation when I’m around you. In all its shades and forms, I… I-” Suddenly Tyler moves from Josh’s lap, he turns halfway around to place his legs above Josh’s, so their faces are now on the same level. ”Me too.” He aspirates. ”And you’re not bad at this, Joshie.” Josh crooks his head a little as he asks back in a whisper ”I’m not?” A giggle escapes the other boy’s mouth as his lips form into an adorable smile. ”No because you’re just perfect at this. It’s perfectly fine.” He notices how Josh stares at his lips. ”Josh” Said boy immediately looks back into Tyler’s eyes. They wander. From his eyes to his lips. Back to his eyes. Back to his lips. There is only a nod because it is enough for Josh to get what Tyler wants. It feels like a deja-vu even though it is something completely new for them. Both lean forward, lips finally touching. It is short and it is everything they need right now. This is already more than anything they have dreamt of. Josh breaks the kiss first, but keeps his face still close to Tyler’s, studying every detail there is to memorize. Like Tyler, he is deep in his thoughts when suddenly his eyes widen. ”Dude, oh my god, we have a show next month. I- I talked to a venue and they said yes!” The grin of Tyler’s could not be brighter. ”No way!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I just had the biggest discovery of this week when I found out that the red carnation is indeed the state flower of Ohio. I'm having lots of questions for Tyler now. 
> 
> If you are wondering why there is no angsty stuff in here, let me tell you that I intended to have it this way. Writing this story has been a way of compensating some personal issues. Maybe the next one will have some angst and demons. 
> 
> Thank you for reading my first fanfiction :)


End file.
